OVO

When it comes to housing, can thinking outside the box mean living inside a box?

The government of the United States of America has deposited 4,000,000 pounds of it in the nation of Iraq. It takes millions of years to go away and is transported in dust by the wind over, say, the rest of the world. What is it? Uranium.

Not even the tiny dancing Hammer can lessen my panic over news such as ‘Police officers in Louisiana no longer need a search or arrest warrant to conduct a brief search of your home or business’ or ‘Gerald Nicosia, who spent more than a decade collecting FBI information about John Kerry, said three of 14 boxes of documents plus a number of loose folders containing hundreds of pages were stolen from his home Thursday afternoon. “It was a very clean burglary. They didn’t break any glass. They didn’t take anything like cameras sitting by. It was a very professional job,” Nicosia said.’ [...] ‘Particular files from the remaining 11 boxes were also taken, Nicosia said, including files containing documents about Kerry that hadn’t been reviewed yet by others. “The three files folders about John Kerry were taken,” Nicosia said. “Those revelations are lost now, at least to me.”‘

Is the American experiment over?

Could you watch professional wrestling for over eight years, all day and all night, never seeing the same thing twice? Soon, the answer will be yes.

What did Scott E. Fahlman do on 19 September 1982 at 11:44? Answer.

How to Beat Women in Accordance with Islam. No, Islam isn’t a violent religion or anything – those 9/11 people were extremists, they weren’t just following orders.

Peta Kooks finally have their own blog!

Pleasant suggests that the following story is not for those gentle readers on a low sodium diet – please take with a great big grain of salt…

“According to a stunning report posted by a retired Navy Lt Commander and 28-year veteran of the Defense Department (DoD), the Bush administration’s assurance about finding weapons of mass destruction in Iraq was based on a Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) plan to ‘plant’ WMDs inside the country. Nelda Rogers, the Pentagon whistleblower, claims the plan failed when the secret mission was mistakenly taken out by ‘friendly fire.’” Hmmm.

According to the Daily Misleader: “Despite President Bush’s pledge that homosexuals ‘ought to have the same rights’ (debates, 10/11/2000) as all other people, his Administration this week ruled that homosexuals can now be fired from the federal workforce because of their sexual orientation.

“According to the Federal Times, the President’s appointee at the Office of Special Counsel ruled that federal employees will now ‘have no recourse if they are fired or demoted simply for being gay.’ While the Bush Administration says it is legally prohibited from firing a person for their conduct, they have the legal right to fire or demote someone based on their sexual orientation. To carry out the directive, the White House has begun removing information from government websites about sexual orientation discrimination in the workplace.

“Not only does the new directive contradict the President’s own promise to treat homosexuals as equals under the law, but it also contradicts what the Administration told Congress. As noted in a bipartisan letter from four Senators to the Administration, ‘During the confirmation process [of the President's appointee], you assured us that you were committed to protecting federal employees against unlawful discrimination related to their sexual orientation.’”

“My god hates fags.” “Oh yeah? Mine too! Let’s be friends.”

Ever wondered how to pick up a man?

Cass Brown of Cancergiggles has agreed to be an Atheist Jesus and DIE FOR YOUR BLOG! Literally! Terminally ill with colon cancer that has spread to both his lungs, his liver and pelvis, Cass has only approximately 6-18 months to go. All you have to do is write the winning limerick regarding his predicament and Cass Brown will be to your website what Jesus is to all mankind! As the winner, your site (or a blog of your choosing) will earn the exclusive right to boast that “Cass Brown Died for this Blog.” Cass will prominently display the honor at his blog, together with the winning submission.

The statement said it supported President Bush in his reelection campaign, and would prefer him to win in November rather than the Democratic candidate John Kerry.

The last words spoken by Albert Einstein are lost to history: he spoke in German and his attendant didn’t understand. But we do have the last words he wrote on paper.

A rare and delightful blend of conspiracy and skepticism, paranoia and self-mockery, to be found at http://www.mackwhite.com/. And great comics to boot!

Some are saying that the unnecessary conflicts and turmoil over same sex marriages is going to get ugly. How’s this for ugly: clergy in New York face a fine or one year in jail for conducting the same sort of same sex marriages they have for 35 years. Clergy don’t take vows (like, say, Mayors) to uphold the law. But to the courts they go, for not breaking laws that shouldn’t exist in the first place. What a fine use of tax dollars that is.

City officials in Aliso Viejo, California were so concerned about the potentially dangerous properties of dihydrogen monoxide that they considered banning foam cups after they learned the chemical was used in their production. Then they learned that dihydrogen monoxide – H2O for short – is the scientific term for water. “It’s embarrassing,” said City Manager David J. Norman. “We had a paralegal who did bad research.” The paralegal apparently fell victim to one of the many official looking Web sites that have been put up by pranksters to describe dihydrogen monoxide as “an odorless, tasteless chemical” that can be deadly if accidentally inhaled. As a result, the City Council of this Orange County suburb had been scheduled to vote next week on a proposed law that would have banned the use of foam containers at city-sponsored events. Among the reasons given for the ban were that they were made with a substance that could “threaten human health and safety.” HAW!

“The whole problem with this idea of obscenity and indecency, and all of these things — bad language and whatever — it’s all caused by one basic thing, and that is: religious superstition. … There’s an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. … It’s reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have.” – George Carlin